October 8, 2008
In two days I will be married. I will be back in Maine early Friday morning about 3 or 4 am. I have enough time to rest. The wedding is at 3 pm of course I have some last minute stuff to attend to like one more fitting. I told Jenny to fit the dress on her since we wear the same size but she told me my boobs are bigger and that won’t work. This whole thing is a giant pain in the ass.
They were together tonight when I called James for an update. She was laughing, they were at the Liquid Clam having dinner and drinks or something. I wonder if they are having one quick thing before him and I get married. Maybe I should I postpone the wedding because I don’t want to be married if they discover they have feelings for one another. They were always close though and when James and I divorced, I think they saw each other because sometimes I would call Jenny on the phone and she wouldn’t answer when she would call back she said she was on a date. If they are having a thing I wish they would tell me and then we can all move on. I would be jacked as hell but I would get over it. That is the price you pay when you are a truck driver, you can’t leave the road because you love the road too much but you can leave the people you love, who are lonely and need someone to make the nights warmer.
Tonight, I called for Broken Guitar. He’s always around where ever I am except for tonight. This is the night I want to meet him and maybe get in one quick fuck before I am married. I gathered all my nerve. I will keep trying for a little while, he’s bound to be somewhere near me. Sometimes, I wonder if I meet Broken Guitar that he is my soul mate and not James. Maybe the reason James hasn’t been asking me to come home is that he is hoping I fall for someone else and dump him so he doesn’t feel bad about jumping Jenny the first chance he gets.
A better plan would be to talk with Jenny alone and say something to her about if he wanted to change his mind I would be cool with that. The problem lately is that they are never apart. If I called her at 3 am she wouldn’t call back until morning (eventhough she stays up late) and for some reason James is with her. Where are you Broken Guitar. Give me on reason to ditch the wedding. The one night I need you, you aren’t around.
