March 13, 2008
So my brother never showed, I debated on calling him but decided against it. As soon as we arrived home to Maine, I dropped Nick off at his house and I haven’t heard from him since. I debated on calling him as well but it is much better off if we part ways. It’s too bad because he is really fun to hang out with just not in bed.
On a much better note James and I spent some time together and we did have fun with out sex. We have come to a realization that we are better off not mixing sex with friendship and we agreed that our long drawn out love affair is stale and time to find new people. I agree, I am just looking for someone right about now. I have been driving a lot lately mostly hoping to catch Broken Guitar on the radio but nothing yet. I am planning on a long trip to California at the end of this month. Things are looking better for the company and I decided I needed a little relaxation and work on office type things and socialize. I really feel out of the loop with everything. I have a friend who is getting married. Hell I didn’t even know she was dating anyone. I miss my friends and I miss people in general.
That is the price I pay to do what I love but is it worth it. Sometimes it is but other times it isn’t. I thought about writing to men on the Internet and meet them when I am nearby. I don’t know I think it is a little desperate and anyway I am mostly interested in a roll in the hay with no “getting to know you” bull shit and attachment some men might get to me.
I am going to Boston this weekend with Jenny. I am sure to pick up some action along the way. Sometimes I wish I was back in my early 20’s and single, I feel like I missed out on quite a bit being married and a truck driver. I am not yet 30 but I feel 40.
